Yelling at your work

Do you ever feel like yelling at your work? Not your co-workers, the work itself.

My office is filled with piles of essays and books I'm supposed to read and papers I'm supposed to grade. On my desk I have five separate to do lists, written on index cards, scrap paper and post it notes. My computer gives me pop up reminders several times a day of things I'm supposed to be doing. My email in box is full of people I need to get back to. I'm prioritizing work, not by its importance, but by how annoying the device is that I set to remind myself to do the task.

I want to scream at all of these things. I want to chew out my computer, upbraid my books, and give the ungraded homeworks a good talking to. I want to take every xeroxed journal article in my office and shove it back into the copying machine where it came from. I want to send random objects from my office via campus mail to random places. Notebooks to the registrar. Calls for papers to the Dean. The office plants can go to biology. I want to create a void here. I want to announce that I have accomplished the floor, and thus can check it off my to do list, an act which would involve peeling off all of the tiles and sending them to the dining hall. I want to eat all of the books in the office. I want to inhale the phone and decompile the software. I want to make it all go away.